I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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