We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
