i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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