Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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