You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize