I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
