Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
