the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize