I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
