So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
