i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
