How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
