Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.

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  (248): Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious. http://tfl.nu/r1dy
  Replies (19) Good night (1024) Bad night (1205)
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  (424): View more from California

  You hurt me so bad and it feels so good

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  (424): You hurt me so bad and it feels so good http://tfl.nu/hvpg
  Replies (4) Good night (1471) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped

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  (914): you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped http://tfl.nu/cz84
  Replies (23) Good night (6903) Bad night (1009)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.

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  (508): My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that. http://tfl.nu/cfj7
  Replies (7) Good night (3390) Bad night (1116)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.

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  (612): I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday. http://tfl.nu/86uh
  Replies (42) Good night (11605) Bad night (1061)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.

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  (414): I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome. http://tfl.nu/m7qx
  Replies (4) Good night (3112) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...

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  (812): Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this... http://tfl.nu/q2aq
  Replies (13) Good night (4241) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.

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  (813): So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one. http://tfl.nu/vysc
  Replies (8) Good night (3678) Bad night (2253)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.

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  (910): shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose. http://tfl.nu/5ocp
  Replies (2) Good night (1436) Bad night (2311)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.

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  (651): We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots. http://tfl.nu/8ot5
  Replies (3) Good night (1995) Bad night (1142)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.

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  (775): She called to say she's single and blow job season is back. http://tfl.nu/ndvl
  Replies (7) Good night (3671) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left

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  (614): Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left http://tfl.nu/4sdk
  Replies (5) Good night (697) Bad night (2300)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful

  (1-423): View more from Tennessee

  breakfast of champions

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  breakfast of stoners

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  (423): animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful (1-423): breakfast of champions (423): breakfast of stoners http://tfl.nu/cslr
  Replies (6) Good night (1284) Bad night (554)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.

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  (207): I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here. http://tfl.nu/lv1x
  Replies (0) Good night (521) Bad night (200)
• Favorite

  (47): View more from Norway

  Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van

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  (47): Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van http://tfl.nu/ihe8
  Replies (2) Good night (235) Bad night (166)

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