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• (914): View more from New York

  she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.

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• (631): View more from New York

  Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle

  Fav 13 1399 3962

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.

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• (914): View more from New York

  Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.

  (512): View more from Texas

  Wont she be proud, Hailey.

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• (510): View more from California

  I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay

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• (772): View more from Florida

  So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (219): View more from Indiana

  If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!

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• (660): View more from Missouri

  hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?

  (816): View more from Missouri

  yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...

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• (650): View more from California

  Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here

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