is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
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