i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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