Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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