Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
