He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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