this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
there was a trapeze. enough said
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.