i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Farmville is her only friend.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
