Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
