I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
