I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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