By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
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The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
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and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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