Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
