Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Be still, my beating vagina.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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