I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize