Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize