I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize