I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
