I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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