OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.