Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
