I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
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why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
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Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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