The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
