It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
