What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
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