is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
