I bet he comes in French.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
