Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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