Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
