they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
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I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
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I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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