I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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