my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
