I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
