i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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