i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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