white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
