Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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