handjob tips. give me some.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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