Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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