i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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